Daily Connector | Changing my narrative Part II: Recognizing feelings vs. values | Brent Miller

Beside my desk at home, I have a note written on a piece of paper that reads, “Concepts can change, but principles always stay the same.” “Always” is underlined. It came from a business-related seminar that I was attending but it resonated with me on a personal level. It was the fall of 2016 and I was struggling with mental health issues.

Since then, I have spent a considerable amount of time learning about me – “self-care” I believe is the current buzzword. I wake up early to meditate, read, journal, and do affirmations. I don’t do all of them every day, I am not that disciplined. In fact, I don’t do all of them ANY day, but I DO do at least one of them every day. What I have discovered is that intentionally starting my day in a place of gratitude makes all the difference in the world.

Funny thing though. Sometimes I wake up in a really bad mood. Sometimes I don’t feel grateful. Sometimes I don’t feel like meditating. Sometimes I don’t feel excited to jump into the book I have been reading. Sometimes I kinda feel like I suck and the thought of affirmations makes me wanna barf. This is where my self-work over the past 4 years has paid off. I’ve learned to recognize my core values and I have learned to recognize my feelings – and the difference between the two.

Through self-examination over the last few years, I have been able to identify core values that are non-negotiable to me. These are principles that, whenever I am faced with a dilemma, a decision, or a challenge, I can look to and (re)act in a manner that is congruent with those non-negotiable values.

I never know when those pesky feelings are going to creep in and try to sabotage all that I’ve worked so hard on though. Feelings should not be ignored but should be recognized for what they are if they are compromising what makes me, me.

An example: if physical fitness is a CORE VALUE of yours, a commitment to that value is what makes you get up and work out when you are FEELING cozy and warm in your bed. 

“Concepts (FEELINGS) can change, but principles (CORE VALUES) always stay the same.”

Change the narrative by always acting in line with your core values. More next week.